Mortgage Advice

It's been awhile. How to start? I suppose at the start of this change. God has a canny way of bringing the best people and placing them in my path. He rescued me from myself and set me on a whole new path. Once I was established on that path, I closed my eyes and walked; easily without thought or hesitation. God finally placed someone in my path that opened my eyes to a whole new light; shook my whole world upside down. It's not an easy thing to face. Change is always met with resistance. And, as the old saying goes, You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink; so it is with people. You can lead a person to truth, but it doesn't make that pill any easier to swallow. It lodges in the throat and has to be coaxed down. Here I stand.

You wouldn't take mortgage advice from a homeless person. So God puts people in our path who have wisdom and experiences to share with us and help guide us. However, every person is different. Sharing the knowledge and wisdom and then being supportive are our roles as the 'mortgage consultants'. Cling to the wisdom and the knowledge given by others. When it is a divine appointment, those words are rarely given lightly. They are meant to be eye openers and directors to what is and what should or shouldn't be. Which is also not something that is easy to swallow when you are so comfortable with how everything is. Comfort can lead to contempt.

Love

Love. Such a small word with some big things behind it. Something that has been on my mind here lately. We guard our hearts so well, but want nothing more than for someone to love them the way they deserve to be loved. Why is loving so hard? Not just from one gender to another, but from one person to another. Whether it be family, friends, or more. Showing that love is something I don't see done very often or very well. I see so much deceit, so many lies, and so much hurt. If this is letting our hearts do the talking, maybe guarding them is better. In the last two years, I've become a much more loving person, and strive to make all that I love know just how much I love them. It is something I yearn for. Something I know every person desires. And something we are all supposed to do. Its not easy. Loving. Instead of critiquing, and hating, and hurting, and caring about ourselves above all else. But what a satisfying feeling, when you get through and touch someone's heart. That, is exactly what I aim for.

Names

Every day, someone says your name. Whether they are speaking to you, calling you, or speaking about you. The power of what we say is so much greater than we realize. We can change the world with a sound. A word. A phrase. In the beginning, God spoke, and something became. Well, names have meanings. They can either be a curse spoken over you daily, or a blessing that is wished upon you by anyone who speaks it. I used to know the meaning of my name, but had forgotten, so I did some research. My first name means lovely, beautiful, victorious, and crown of laurel. I wasn't sure what that last one meant, and after some digging found out that it is something that is placed upon the heads of victorious people in sports and war. My middle name means light, or shining light. Put together, I am a beautiful, victorious, shining light. Every time my name is on someone's lips, I am being blessed. Its a wonderful feeling knowing that my mom gave me such a meaningful name.

Falling

Falling away from where I was. From where I should be. Who knew it would be so easy? Who knew I could go so far? Seeing where I was, and looking around at where I am fills me with a sense of longing. A longing to be back there, back where things are good, and I know who I am and who I serve. I know what happened, and I know what must now happen. All I need is the strength and the faith to do so.

Poems

BEAUTIFUL TEARS
Cry those beautiful tears
Let them fall, release your fears
A life of difficulty and hardships
Told by the salty wet upon your lips
Cry those beautiful tears

One by one, let them down
Out of your eyes so brown
Not a person understanding
Oh, the mascara trail branding
Cry those beautiful tears

Tears like rain may fall
Friends and family come to call
Run fast and hide your shame
Watch the little flicker flame
Cry those beautiful tears

(UNTITLED)
I push you away
My ever-present friend
But as I cry, you stay
Holding me till the end

As I slowly settle down
You wipe away my tears
Whisper into my hair, soft brown
Try to chase away my fears

I let you hold me tight
Cling my arms around your neck
Keep my through the night
Put my threatening tears in check

Morning light finds my eyes
Heavy head rest against your chest
I rise and fall as your chest, it sighs
Quietly I lay and let you rest

I want to push you away
But I don't want you to go
This beginning of the day
Has just so much to show

Consuming Fire

Let it flow. Let it burn. Fire needs to consume your life, needs to overtake you. A hunger is released in you and the youth around you. Fear not rejection, for the only rejection that could matter, won't happen. We live in a world that needs the consumption that is coming but it needs to be led by the young people. They will do things never seen before by this or any living generation. Word of their faith travels far and wide. Continue to learn, but know where priority lies. Understand the opportunities open to you and seize them! Don't waste away. Death brings life, and that life will be all the better when you give in and take charge. I will open any door you knock upon. Every opportunity you see or create will be granted to the seeker. A generation is rising that will lead every other generation, that will know a burning hunger and a consuming fire never known before. Annointings run deep and it will be made clear who the annointed are. The nations will be on their knees, and though there will be wards of blood and violence, the world will bring them to light, the youth will have an obvious hand in it all. We are a chosen generation. The youth are the light.

Coming Back

No matter how far you falter from the path, just look up and look around. There is always someone around who is going to pull you back to light. The mistakes you make are going to be forgiven, for God's mercy is just a prayer away. There is no greater feeling than knowing that, even as a sinner, you are loved by God. He loves you and forgives you. It is a lesson that, when learned it is something that will draw you very near to God. That is what we should all strive for. Closeness and intimacy with God.