Love

Love. Such a small word with some big things behind it. Something that has been on my mind here lately. We guard our hearts so well, but want nothing more than for someone to love them the way they deserve to be loved. Why is loving so hard? Not just from one gender to another, but from one person to another. Whether it be family, friends, or more. Showing that love is something I don't see done very often or very well. I see so much deceit, so many lies, and so much hurt. If this is letting our hearts do the talking, maybe guarding them is better. In the last two years, I've become a much more loving person, and strive to make all that I love know just how much I love them. It is something I yearn for. Something I know every person desires. And something we are all supposed to do. Its not easy. Loving. Instead of critiquing, and hating, and hurting, and caring about ourselves above all else. But what a satisfying feeling, when you get through and touch someone's heart. That, is exactly what I aim for.

Names

Every day, someone says your name. Whether they are speaking to you, calling you, or speaking about you. The power of what we say is so much greater than we realize. We can change the world with a sound. A word. A phrase. In the beginning, God spoke, and something became. Well, names have meanings. They can either be a curse spoken over you daily, or a blessing that is wished upon you by anyone who speaks it. I used to know the meaning of my name, but had forgotten, so I did some research. My first name means lovely, beautiful, victorious, and crown of laurel. I wasn't sure what that last one meant, and after some digging found out that it is something that is placed upon the heads of victorious people in sports and war. My middle name means light, or shining light. Put together, I am a beautiful, victorious, shining light. Every time my name is on someone's lips, I am being blessed. Its a wonderful feeling knowing that my mom gave me such a meaningful name.

Falling

Falling away from where I was. From where I should be. Who knew it would be so easy? Who knew I could go so far? Seeing where I was, and looking around at where I am fills me with a sense of longing. A longing to be back there, back where things are good, and I know who I am and who I serve. I know what happened, and I know what must now happen. All I need is the strength and the faith to do so.

Poems

BEAUTIFUL TEARS
Cry those beautiful tears
Let them fall, release your fears
A life of difficulty and hardships
Told by the salty wet upon your lips
Cry those beautiful tears

One by one, let them down
Out of your eyes so brown
Not a person understanding
Oh, the mascara trail branding
Cry those beautiful tears

Tears like rain may fall
Friends and family come to call
Run fast and hide your shame
Watch the little flicker flame
Cry those beautiful tears

(UNTITLED)
I push you away
My ever-present friend
But as I cry, you stay
Holding me till the end

As I slowly settle down
You wipe away my tears
Whisper into my hair, soft brown
Try to chase away my fears

I let you hold me tight
Cling my arms around your neck
Keep my through the night
Put my threatening tears in check

Morning light finds my eyes
Heavy head rest against your chest
I rise and fall as your chest, it sighs
Quietly I lay and let you rest

I want to push you away
But I don't want you to go
This beginning of the day
Has just so much to show